Vigilant or Paranoid?

As I was browsing the net, I saw this article of Jim Paredes reposted by Saab Magalona.I have experienced the two events that will put a person especially a girl into a life-long trauma. This made me think of giving my own point of view regarding these scary experience but was able to get through it successfully.

The first one was when I was in 3rd year college. I was a Student Assistant then. During that time, we transferred to our houes in Muntinlupa City. Thus, having no choice but to take a boarding house and practice my being independent.It was that gloomy October 07, 2001 morning that this incident happened. I was on my way to my duty as a SA riding on a HM Transpot Bus bound to Sta. Cruz. During that time, I am already a vigilant something I learned from nanay. So, when I rode the bus, I looked for a place, near the driver. Unfotunately, the bus was almost full that I have no choice but to sit a three-seater beside a dark, fat man wearing a black jacket. I sat beside the aisle. When the bus was about to go, this young man, from the back, asked for the vacant seat. I got irritated. I am "mataray" to strangers talaga. Hmp! So I move to gave him the seat near the aisle. I really do not know what made me move and was now in between that 2 man. After which, at the toll gate in Calamba, I felt a creature or something in my skirt moving, and when I look down, I saw the young man's hand moving towards my private part.

That was it.

I got my umbrella with me and hit the young man as hard as I could! The pretending-to-be sleep young man, open his eyes and ask what was happening. I shout at him. Cursed him words that he deserved. Everyone in the bus, who might be asleep during the travel, were all awaken by the noise I made. The bus conductor approached me and told me that he'll drop me by the nearest police station to file a complain. The man beside me, whom I thought was threat, encouraged me to pursue and make the complain. The man, after that continue to talk to me. But the people around, protected me.

God is good all the time.

Hay.

We headed next to the main police station and I filed the complain. My College friends, kuya Ricky, Anton and Gary (Who by then, was just a friend) has gone to the station to fetch and pacify me.

Hay, until now, I am still afraid of it. That it might happen again. But God knows, I will be fighting for my dear life and hopefully will not be able to encounter such again.

For the young man, he was convicted of the charges, Act of Lasciviousness to be specific.

The other experience was a hold-up incident. I shall post it here when I have time, okies.

So here it goes.. =)
Jim Paredes wrote: Something that happened in Katipunan, Q.C.

Dear friends,

Many of you may not have heard of the incident that happened to a friend of my son last week at about 6:30 pm right in front of the thickly-populated area of BPI-Katipunan, near Shoppersville. She parked her car right in front of BPI to make a withdrawal and to do some grocery. As she was getting into her car after doing her chores, a man suddenly appeared beside her and tried to bully her into moving to the passenger seat. When she pressed her car horn to call attention, he pushed her in the car and pinned her down with his elbow on her neck. It was a good thing that she had the presence of mind to continue to struggle and press on her car horn to catch attention (even if she had to use her foot to do this). Her assailant even tried to make people believe that it was a domestic matter by telling the crowd not to get involved as it was a "private matter". But with the onlookers multiplying by the second, her assailant finally gave up and ran. That was when she stood up and shouted for help. Thank God the guy got caught and is now under police custody. Last Saturday, during the inquest, she told me that what gave her the guts to fight her assailant was the article "THROUGH A RAPIST'S EYES" forwarded to our e-group about a week prior to her attack. I am re-forwarding the article (you can find it at the bottom of this e-mail) for everyone's benefit. Please tell your friends, family, and loved ones about this. It works. May I just add that to a certain extent, we have to get ourselves involved if we see violence being committed on anyone like calling on a security guard or a police officer even if it appears to be a domestic matter. It seems that a lot of attackers use that tactic to get away with violence. Not many people know how to take care of themselves when faced with such a situation. Everyone, please be very, very careful. THOUGHT THIS WAS GOOD INFO TO PASS ALONG... FYI - Through a rapist's eyes!

A group of rapists and date rapists in prison were interviewed on what they look for in a potential victim and here are some interesting facts:

1] The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle. They are most likely to go after a woman w ith a ponytail, bun, braid or other hairstyle that can easily be grabbed. They are also likely to go after a woman with long hair. Women with short hair are not common targets.

2] The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for women whose clothing is easy to remove quickly. Many of them carry scissors around to cut clothing.

3] They also look for women on their cell phone, searching through their purse or doing other activities while walking because they are off guard and can be easily overpowered.

4] The number one place women are abducted from/attacked at is a grocery store parking lot.

5] Number two are office parking lots/garages.

6] Number three are public restrooms.

7] The thing about these men is that they are looking to grab a woman and quickly move her to a second location where they don't have to worry about getting caught.

8] If you put up any kind of a fight at all, they get discouraged because it only takes a minute or two for them to realize that going after you isn't worth it because it will be time-consuming.

9] These men said they would not pick on women who have umbrellas, or other similar objects that can be used from a distance, in their hands.

10] Keys are not a deterrent because you have to get really close to the attacker to use them as a weapon. So, the idea is to convince these guys you're not worth it.

POINTS THAT WE SHOULD REMEMBER:

1] If someone is following behind you on a street or in a garage or with you in an elevator or stairwell, look them in the face and ask them a question, like 'what time is it', or make general small talk like 'can't believe it is so cold out here, we're in for a bad winter'. Now that you've seen their faces and could identify them in a line- up, you lose appeal as a target.

2] If someone is coming toward you, hold out your hands in front of you and yell 'Stop!' or 'Stay back!' Most of the rapists this man talked to said they'd leave a woman alone if she yelled or showed that she would not be afraid to fight back. Again, they are looking for an EASY target.

3] If you carry pepper spray (this instructor was a huge advocate of it and carries it with him wherever he goes,) yelling 'I HAVE PEPPER SPRAY!' and holding it out will be a deterrent.

4] If someone grabs you, you can't beat them with strength but you can do it by outsmarting them. If you are grabbed around the waist from behind, pinch the attacker either under the arm between the elbow and armpit or in the upper inner thigh - HARD. One woman in a class this guy taught told him she used the underarm pinch on a guy who was trying to date rape her and was so upset she broke through the skin and tore out muscle strands the guy needed stitches. Try pinching yourself in those places as hard as you can stand it; it really hurts.

5] After the initial hit, always go for the groin. I know from a particularly unfortunate experience that if you slap a guy's parts it is extremely painful. You might think that you'll anger the guy and make him want to hurt you more, but the thing these rapists told our instructor is that they want a woman who will not cause him a lot of trouble. Start causing trouble, and he's out of there.

6] When the guy puts his hands up to you, grab his first two fingers and bend them back as far as possible with as much pressure pushing down on them as possible. The instructor did it to me without using much pressure, and I ended up on my knees and both knuckles cracked audibly.

7] Of course the things we always hear still apply. Always be aware of your surroundings, take someone with you if you can and if you see any odd behavior, don't dismiss it, go with your instincts. You may feel a little silly at the time, but you'd feel much worse if the guy really was trouble.

FINALLY, PLEASE REMEMBER THESE AS WELL ...

I know you are smart enough to know these pointers but there will be some time, when you will go "Hmm... I must remember that." After reading, forward it to someone you care about. Never hurts to be careful in this crazy world we live in.

1. Tip from Tae Kwon Do: The elbow is the strongest point on your body. If you are close enough to use it, do it.

2. Learned this from a tourist guide to New Orleans: If a robber asks for your wallet and/or purse, DO NOT HAND IT TO HIM. Toss it away from you... chances are that he is more interested in your wallet and/or purse than you and he will go for the wallet and/or purse. RUN LIKE MAD IN THE OTHER DIRECTION!

3. If you are ever thrown into the trunk of a car: Kick out the back tail lights and stick your arm out the hole and start waving like crazy. The driver won't see you but everybody else will. This has saved lives.

4. Women have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping, eating, working, etc., and just sit (doing their checkbook, or making a list, etc.) DON'T DO THIS!The predator will be watching you, and this is the perfect opportunity for him to get in on the passenger side, put a gun to your head, and tell you where to go. AS SOON AS YOU LOCK YOUR DOORS...LEAVE! 5. A few notes about getting into your car in a parking lot, or parking garage:

a. Be aware. Look around you. Look into your car, at the passenger side floor, and in the back seat.
b. If you are parked next to a big van, enter your car from the passenger door. Most serial killers attack their victims by pulling them into their vans while the women are attempting to get into their cars.
c. Look at the car parked on the driver's side of your vehicle, and the passenger side. If a male is sitting alone in the seat nearest your car, you may want to walk back into the mall, or work, and get a guard/policeman to walk you back out. IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY. (And better paranoid than dead.)

6. ALWAYS take the elevator instead of the stairs. (Stairwells are horrible places to be alone and the perfect crime spot).

7. If the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, ALWAYS RUN! The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times. And even then, it most likely WILL NOT be a vital organ. RUN!

8. As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic: STOP IT! It may get you raped, or killed. Ted Bundy, the serial killer, was a good-looking, well educated man, who ALWAYS played on the sympathies of unsuspecting women. He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often asked "for help" into his vehicle or with his vehicle, which is when he abducted his next victim.

I'd like you to forward this to all the women you know. It may save a life. A candle is not dimmed by lighting another candle. I was going to send this to the ladies only, but guys, if you love your mothers, wives, sisters, daughters, etc., you may want to pass it onto them, as well. Send this to any woman you know that may need to be reminded that the world we live in has a lot of crazies in it and it's better safe than sorry.